He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
