Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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