we have officially lost it.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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