Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Houston, we have a squirter
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
