Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Randomize
