I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
