he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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