I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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