It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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