No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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