I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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