She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
