I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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