bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize