Don't you send me to vm
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
