In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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