Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
