STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Randomize