I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
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