He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
