Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
