What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
