You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
