T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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