the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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