So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize