he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
