I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
