I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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