if you like me you must not know who I am
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I have feelings that need drinking.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
