dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize
