in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
