things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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