I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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