i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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