My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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