I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
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