you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
