Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
