a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Randomize
