I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
