if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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