so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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