CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
