It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
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