we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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