Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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