Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
