I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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