So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
